Just a few words to someone held dear Who weighed in at 10.2 with lungs loud and clear, Your Dad looked so proud, as your Mum shed a tear For their chubby little baby with fair to blonde hair. Growing up was hard - sometimes patches in your pants, and cardboard in your shoes to help keep out the damp So you decided to work at a very early age And do like your brother to earn your own wage You carried heavy cases to and from cars At Victoria Station where all the trains are, Tips were so good that you managed to save For a whistle and flute of Edwardian days. Time marches on and married you are now With two sons and a daughter of whom you're very proud, A little more attention to the wife would be nice Since she is the one who helps you through life. You worked for the Gas Board but not for very long A misunderstanding and then you were gone! Then a shop became vacant at the end of your street And with Mother-in-Law's help you obtained your first lease. Now the proud owner of a 'fruit and veg' shop Up went the signs "Please don't touch the stock", With long hours, sheer stamina helped you pull through And you ended up in business with shops one and two. Jubilee year, party near, kids in the street all ready to cheer Up the ladder you did go, to fly the flags across the road, Tired and weary, knees very weak, you got to the ground to have a peek A high topped lorry, unforeseen, just scooped the lot right from the scene Your wife decided it's time for fun, so booked for you a strippergram Into the pub she was told to go, but only when the lights were low, Thoughts of modesty were no more, as all your clothes dropped to the floor You would not believe it to be true - photos were shown to prove it was you! You're a lover of squash and play twice a week - To help keep the pounds from your backside cheeks, These are but a few words I have written about you And I hope that now you've read them they bring a smile or two!